I did that once. Putting my life on hold. And my mind was consistently in a state of confusion. Each time i bought something it made me feel guilty and also worried.
I put my life on hold for 5 years. The 5 years which I couldn't decide whether I will move to another country or not. Thinking back I think I was so foolish. If it was something i really wanted, I would have move in a heart beat but I didn't. I consistently weigh what I should do.
Now I realized, those precious moments are lost forever. Lost opportunities, lost potential partners... I cannot bring back those moments nor can I reclaim the lost times.
But I have now learn to live to my best. If i wanted something, and I know I am able to afford it after thinking whether I need it.. or once a while indulging myself with something expensive, I would. Maybe that's one other thing that has made me look happier. But those are temporary happiness as my priest would say. I have also been trying to save as much as I can. Also in away avoiding assholes that keep putting me down. Little by little... i think I am beginning to live in the moment.
Also I want to live now in the moment and not think about what will happen tomorrow. Who knows maybe I might drop dead tomorrow, or u know... future is so uncertain....
Yes, I do still think about having children, getting married. which I know may never materialize in my life time. But I still have hope.
But I have learnt to not live in the past nor... regret the 5 years which I placed my life on hold.
Not even sure if anyone understood what I just wrote hahaha
Saturday, May 30, 2009
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Good comments for the Day!
I met an old friend at klcc today. Its been awhile since I last saw her. First thing she said when she saw me was that I look happier. My face has clear of all the tension, stress. I don't know coz i don't know how i looked before.
Throughout our conversation she kept asking what have I done differently. I actually am not sure.I guess I started exercising and probably caring less about work. Making a distinction between time at work and leisure.
I make it a point these days, not to switch on my laptop at home unless I absolutely have to. e.g when I have nite conferences or I have some really pressing things which I need to resolve.
I guess in a way, I can say it took some effort but I still have a long way to go.
Even in my appraisal, I did put a goal as in putting my health first and I guess that did help...
Another point to me.. :)
Throughout our conversation she kept asking what have I done differently. I actually am not sure.I guess I started exercising and probably caring less about work. Making a distinction between time at work and leisure.
I make it a point these days, not to switch on my laptop at home unless I absolutely have to. e.g when I have nite conferences or I have some really pressing things which I need to resolve.
I guess in a way, I can say it took some effort but I still have a long way to go.
Even in my appraisal, I did put a goal as in putting my health first and I guess that did help...
Another point to me.. :)
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
I made the 15 minutes
I made it ....!!!!
Managed to run 15 min non stop on the threadmill. Additional 5 min from the usual 10 min. of the 30 min i am on the threadmill.
I am so happy.... I didn't feel really tired or whatever.... hahahaha
Next milestone.... add another 5 min. to achieve 20 min.... :D out of the 30 min...
dup dup bi do
Managed to run 15 min non stop on the threadmill. Additional 5 min from the usual 10 min. of the 30 min i am on the threadmill.
I am so happy.... I didn't feel really tired or whatever.... hahahaha
Next milestone.... add another 5 min. to achieve 20 min.... :D out of the 30 min...
dup dup bi do
Sunday, May 17, 2009
The Quest to a Healthier Life Style
Not really :D
The quest to reduce my high BP has become my goal in life. In a way, I still struggling to achieve this.
I used to be a sprinter in school. I ran the 100, 200, 4*100 relay. Since I was in Primary school. When I reached form 4-5, I had to stop as my mom said I needed to concentrate on my studies instead and that was the most trying time for in my school years.
After that I never touched running again except for that one 1/2 semester in my sophomore year where I have had to take the stupid cross country class... almost died running hahahaa. Kidding. It was WINTERRRRR what did you expect?
I have been going to the gym at my office since nov/dec 2008. I was going off and on way before that but lack of motivation really didn't help either. You could just imagine the frequency. But I was more regular when the dr told me I had to start exercising or risk getting all the diseases which came with high BP.
I started off really slow, Just walking for 30 min and then on the cross trainer for another 30 min. As of Last month, I had tried to add some running. But i noticed I couldn't go beyond 10 mins running straight at the speed of 60-70 depending on which threadmill I am using. Yeah some of them are like broken.. sorta. My goal is to at least raise it up above 10 min. So far no luck yet. But I want to. I do that I m able to endure this and perservere and increase it bit by bit.
Wish me Luck and loads of motivation
The quest to reduce my high BP has become my goal in life. In a way, I still struggling to achieve this.
I used to be a sprinter in school. I ran the 100, 200, 4*100 relay. Since I was in Primary school. When I reached form 4-5, I had to stop as my mom said I needed to concentrate on my studies instead and that was the most trying time for in my school years.
After that I never touched running again except for that one 1/2 semester in my sophomore year where I have had to take the stupid cross country class... almost died running hahahaa. Kidding. It was WINTERRRRR what did you expect?
I have been going to the gym at my office since nov/dec 2008. I was going off and on way before that but lack of motivation really didn't help either. You could just imagine the frequency. But I was more regular when the dr told me I had to start exercising or risk getting all the diseases which came with high BP.
I started off really slow, Just walking for 30 min and then on the cross trainer for another 30 min. As of Last month, I had tried to add some running. But i noticed I couldn't go beyond 10 mins running straight at the speed of 60-70 depending on which threadmill I am using. Yeah some of them are like broken.. sorta. My goal is to at least raise it up above 10 min. So far no luck yet. But I want to. I do that I m able to endure this and perservere and increase it bit by bit.
Wish me Luck and loads of motivation
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
FaceBook Versus Blogging
Obviously I started with blogging first before Facebook. Coz during that time, FB wasn't the fab or the in-thing yet.
When I first got on to facebook, I actually stopped blogging. Or rather I already stopped blogging for awhile. I frequently updated the status bit.... then when the number of friends started to increase esp those from work, I decided to be more reserved.
Of late, I got back into blogging coz found that its still a best way for me to express what I feel.
There was also an element that contributed to this all and its because someone commented on my status update lately. I don't know why some people just like to make them look like they are more superior than others and then make comments such like i know its your life but....
Whatever it was, I am not going to repeat it and I also did not reply to her email.
Anyways... i have decided that... since FB is so now open and I have people working with me as part of the friends list albeit under the limited profile list , its still much safer blogging like here anonymously.
continue to find out more about my life rather than FB.
When I first got on to facebook, I actually stopped blogging. Or rather I already stopped blogging for awhile. I frequently updated the status bit.... then when the number of friends started to increase esp those from work, I decided to be more reserved.
Of late, I got back into blogging coz found that its still a best way for me to express what I feel.
There was also an element that contributed to this all and its because someone commented on my status update lately. I don't know why some people just like to make them look like they are more superior than others and then make comments such like i know its your life but....
Whatever it was, I am not going to repeat it and I also did not reply to her email.
Anyways... i have decided that... since FB is so now open and I have people working with me as part of the friends list albeit under the limited profile list , its still much safer blogging like here anonymously.
continue to find out more about my life rather than FB.
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